Dont ASK~

(7.12.2010)
Dont ask me how
Dont ask me when
Dont ask me anything
How did I lose my phone
How did all my memories I had in my phone
the pictures I took together with my friends
All vanish in a day
I wanted to be sad
But my emotions are not really there
I was numb and shock as to how it all happened ??

I was confused
I am desperate to know what my LIFE is getting to . .
It was suppose to be a happy day for me with my friends
as I was going to leave Kl soon . .
I QUIT nursing and I was glad that all my burden finally went away


But,


(8.12.2010)
my dad was bothering me
How ??
By not saying a word ~
I dont know what he's thinking about me quitting nursing
I had no idea what he was thinking when I told him I lost my phone
He did not scold me as I had wished him to
TO at least ease how I'm feeling . .
The financial problems my dad is facing must be a burden
when I saw him smoking
It must be difficult to have me as his demanding daughter

I hate myself for being selfish too
I wanted to make a promise
To make my parents life easy
But What if I cant make it ??
WELL, it's not up to me to decide. .
I'll just have to give my 110% in everything I'll do

Dont ask me how,
But

If; When I'm sad,
I'll think about how sad my parents will be for me

If; When I'm stuck and out of idea,
I'll think about the money that my parents had used on me to bail me out and for me to start a fresh new one

If; When I think I'm going to fail,
I'll think about how disappointed my parents will on me

I wish things would go well . . PLEASE ~